by Gil Crowley
You’ve got yourself a date with a great guy and you really like him. You would love to see him again, so make sure that you don’t turn him off by saying and doing the wrong things.
Here are 8 turn-offs to bear in mind when dating men:
Don’t boast about yourself and your achievements.
Yes, it’s good to be proud of who you are, what you have done in your life and how you look, but don’t go too far. Be careful not to appear arrogant by bragging about what you have done or comparing what he has done to something you have experienced yourself. Give him a chance to tell his stories too and don’t over-dominate the conversation with your achievements.
Make an effort with conversation.
Don’t just sit there quietly letting him do all the talking and just giving yes and no answers. If you don’t participate in conversation by asking him about himself in return for the questions he asks to find out about you, he will assume that you are not interested in him.
Don’t try and control or dominate him.
Avoid picking faults with him about his appearance or the way he speaks, the places he likes going or who he hangs out with. If you are constantly pulling him down, he will very quickly get annoyed with you and totally turned off.
If you are constantly pulling yourself down for the sole purpose of him pulling you up again, then he will find this very annoying. This is just attention-seeking behaviour and he will see through it. Men don’t like drama queens who just love all the attention they can get.
Not giving him your full attention.
If you are out on a date, then you should always give your full attention to your mate and not allow yourself to be distracted by other things such as your mobile phone or your private thoughts. There is nothing worse than being ignored when he has been looking forward to spending time with you.
Being non-committal to future plans.
If you can’t commit to a future date or you are constantly cancelling plans at the last minute, you will be giving him the impression that you are keeping your options open in case something better comes along. This will make him feel that he is not really very important in your life.
Bad manners or poor social etiquette.
Don’t take your guy for granted. If he behaves like a gentleman on a date, for example holding open a door for you, make sure you thank him. If he pays for your meal or drink, always remember to thank him. If he’s talking don’t cut him off mid-sentence, don’t go off and talk to someone else when you are supposed to be with him.
If he texts you, make sure you reply within a reasonable time. Don’t be rude to waiting staff when you are out. These sort of things give an overall impression of the sort of person you are, so can easily turn off a guy.
Getting too serious too soon.
Don’t make the mistake of assuming that you are now in a relationship just because you’ve had a successful first date. You will scare him off if you start constantly calling him and start talking about the future too soon. Take time to get to know each other as friends first.
Now that you have inside information on what not to do on a date, you should be well on the way to turning your man on, not turning him off.
Gill Crowley has been running her own dating agency in the UK for the past 20 years and has helped thousands of people to find love over the years. She has recently sold the business so that she can concentrate on writing.
She contributes to a number of newsletter as well as her own blog. She is currently working on a number of ebooks, two of which are now available on Amazon Kindle. You can find details of these on her website and also learn more about Gill and her projects. Please visit www.howtomeetagoodman.com or follow her on twitter @tlcdating.